[10/25/07] 28 Cases Later...

Breaking News: Extopian Festival marred by outbreak of Flesh Eating Disease

Extopia – Government officials today confirmed that a viral and extremely communicable form of necrotizing fasciitis, more commonly referred to as flesh eating disease, appeared at a recent outdoor game festival.

The virus causes small wounds to become much more aggravated as the flesh is slowly eaten away. If left unchecked, it can completely consume the skin of the victim, providing them with a lucrative career as an “after” model in ad campaigns related to skin cancer, Republicanism or the anti-zombie movement.

The disease is spread in much the same way that the medical visionaries in Hollywood warned us that it would be, from one of the infected individuals coming into contact with an open would on an uninfected person. Much of this comes as no surprise to Extopian officials, most of whom had seen 28 Days Later.

While the ultimate source of the outbreak has not yet been determined, officials believe it may have been spread to festival-goers by the large pack of wild dogs that call the area home.

Normally, the government would round up and exterminate the feral animals, but in this case that seems unlikely.

Speaking on the condition on anonymity, one Government official said that it would be easier if “they weren’t all so goddamn cute” and that destroying the cause of the outbreak “Would have been so much easier if it had just been Holmes.”

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